Words

The written word has always been my friend. Even when my thoughts don’t make sense and my words run in circles on the paper, somehow, words give me comfort. 

Looking back I vividly remember always writing notes to my friends. I found comfort. I found acceptance. I found myself somewhere in between those ink filled words on paper.I never really noticed how important words are to me until recently.

I lied. Until today.

For as long as I can remember, I used to write just to write…. Even if my grammar wasn’t the best, my mind still raced and my stories came to life when the ink hit the paper, even if it was only for a moment. Although, for much of my ‘writing career’ my words were just words, mostly words that I couldn’t spit of my mouth.

The ironic thing about me, or maybe it’s not too ironic… I write better than I speak.

For some reason I always have a hard time saying exactly what I want to say. I feel before I think. And when I think too much about something, whether it’s a sad or a joyful moment, my brain triggers a deep emotion and I keep it inside, hiding behind a wall and kept on the other side of my heart.Maybe it’s the introvert in me. Or maybe I’m just an emotional being that would rather swim in my feelings than share them with the world. 

Until I explode.

I'm still a work in progress and inbetween the mess and the scribbled lines, God has a greater purpose for my life. 

Maybe one day....

I’m going to write a book one day. I’m going to win an award. I’m going to write a Christian devotional. I’m going to go on a mission trip. I’m going to learn to speak and write better. I’m going to read more and try to spend my time doing more of what God has called me to do.

I want to love my husband more. I want to be loved. I want to give thanks. I will always praise God during the storm and seek His shelter when I’m lost.

Despite all these things I want to do…. The reality is I might not get to all of them…. But the one thing, the most important thing I’ll always do is trust in God and praise Him through any storm.